The Gratitude

It is so, so important to have a thankful heart. With the prevalence of social media in today’s society, it can be so easy for us to compare our lives to those of other people. We see what everyone else has, whether that be their significant other, the friends they have, or the places they visit. That can cause us to wish we had those things as well. However, what we don’t see is the mess behind the photo. Everyone has their own struggles and their own secrets.

No one’s life is better than anyone else’s. It’s important for us to remember, especially nearing the Thanksgiving season, to be grateful for the blessings we have. Give thanks for the people in your life, the job you have, and the life you live. Your life is uniquely you and you get the chance to make an impact that nobody else can.

Whenever you feel jealousy start to creep in or you feel like things just aren’t going your way, remember to stop and think of all the amazing things you do have in your life. When your perspective changes, your feelings will change, and you will be a lot happier because of it. This is a lesson I have been learning myself.

Trust God and count your blessings. Happy Thanksgiving!

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The Symphony

It’s my last semester of my undergraduate degree in college. The stress is high; the future is uncertain. There’s so much left to do and seemingly so little time to do it. Everyone is giving me advice, telling me to pursue this path or that: a full-time job or continuing education by getting a Master’s degree. In the midst of that, I have exams, homework, group projects, job interviews, and projects to deal with at my internship. There are constant pressures placed on me from both those around me and from within myself. I want to succeed. I want to choose the right path. But what is it?

God tells me in His still small voice to just surrender. Surrender my worries, doubts, and fears. Surrender my need for control, my need to know what the future holds. I was brought to tears this morning at church during worship because I felt the Holy Spirit move in my heart. He revealed to me that I am putting needless pressure on myself. Things will work out. He is in control.

One particular song keeps jumping out at me, reminding me of who God is. The song is Symphony. The lyrics say:

Even in the madness there is peace

        Drowning out the voices all around me

        Through all of this chaos you are writing a symphony”

He sees my life, He knows what I am going through, and He will find a way to carry me through it all. I just have to trust Him.

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The Transition

Sometimes I feel like life is moving too fast. It just keeps flowing like a river and won’t stop to let me catch up. I am currently in finals week of my penultimate semester of undergraduate college.  The transition from constant school into working over the summer can be a challenging one. I’m so used to not having free time that when I do, I’m a little clueless as to how to fill my time. I have a list of things I want to accomplish over the summer, that I hope to pursue in the coming weeks.

I landed a new job as an accounting intern instead of my current position as a student assistant with the college. I’m excited but nervous to start this new journey in my career path. As a college student, I struggle with anxiety because things in my life are constantly changing and I sometimes feel like I don’t have control over my life. Which, in fact, I don’t. However, there is such comfort in knowing that God DOES. He knows exactly what is going to happen and where I’m going to end up. I’ve been blessed with having people in my life as constants amid all the changes I’ve been going through.

One of my biggest fears is uncertainty. I hate not knowing what’s going to happen and I find myself analyzing any decision I make to determine what the consequences will be. I have to free myself from this need to have control and instead follow the path laid before me. It will all work out in the end because I know God is working all things for good.

 

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The Sermon

Do you ever have those sermons that really touch the depths of your soul and stir you to action? Well today was one of those sermons. We had a guest speaker at church and of course my first thought was meh, could be good, could be so-so. Boy was I wrong! The pastor talked about getting rid of distractions and making time for the Lord. I never realized how much of my time I actually spend on social media or watching TV rather than spending time in the Word or in prayer.

Everyone complains about not having enough time to read their Bible or find time to pray but if we’re honest, we just don’t prioritize it. It takes a conscious decision like eating breakfast or brushing your teeth, and it has to be thought about continuously until it becomes a habit. God rewards those who seek Him. Obedience to God means trusting Him even without knowing the details, without having a clue where the path leads or where the road ends. It means giving in 100% effort and without delay. The more excuses we make, the longer we stray off the path that leads to His righteous plan, and the longer we delay fulfilling our true calling.

As a person with anxiety, I struggle with this a lot. I strive for planning, organizing, making lists, and being prepared for any scenario. Any uncertainty drives me to fear and restlessness. The thought of giving God the reigns on my life is so, so hard. But I know it is so, so worth it. I made the decision to change my social media habits and pursue a career path I never thought was possible for me. All it takes is a leap of faith and the trust in knowing that God sees it all; nothing is a mystery to Him. Will you put your faith and step blindly into the unknown? If you do, you might find the answer you never knew you needed.

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The Meaning

“I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” – Psalm 139:14

One thing I have always struggled with is self-confidence. Growing up, I never had a boyfriend, in fact, I was never even asked out by a guy. It never really bothered me until high school, when I started to believe that something was wrong with me. I’ve never really been skinny and in middle school I had somewhat of a “heavy” phase and I thought I could never move past it. I made some changes in high school and got down to a “normal” weight, but I still never felt pretty enough. I’ve been friends with some gorgeous girls and my self-esteem began wearing down.

Now that I am in college, the comparison game is stronger than ever. Everyone is trying to make their mark and find a place to fit in. My looks became quite important  to me as I joined dating apps and believed I needed to make myself look good for prospective dates. Now that I have a loving, awesome boyfriend, I realize that I don’t need to push myself to unattainable physical goals.

But the biggest truth of all is that I have a loving, all-powerful, and all-knowing God who has always been there and always will be. He accepts me no matter what I look like and He created me specifically as I am to fulfill a purpose that only I can. I think this verse in Psalms is a wonderful reminder of God’s love and devotion and the reassurance that He hand-crafted us and knew our qualities and our looks before we were born. He is in full control and He loves me just the same, no matter how I look.

 

Love Stories

The Boat

Ever since I was little, I’ve always loved being out on the water. Growing up around lakes and oceans, I gained lots of experience with jet skis and cruise ships. The water is somewhat of a getaway for me. I find comfort and peace that I can never feel on land. I let my worries go away. Today was no different.

It was a day of new experiences, meeting people and learning about the importance of family. Out on the boat I felt alive. I got to experience the thrills of the water twice. The first time was about a real connection to the water and the people surrounding me, but the second time is the one I will always remember.

It was sunset. I sat at the back of the boat caressed by my boyfriend’s arms. The awe of seeing painted colors in the sky reflected on the water was coupled with my love for the human beside me. In a meshing of sorts, the colors reflected what I was feeling. Looking at the person I love most made me so keenly aware of the tenderness of the moment and the need to keep it at the forefront of my memory for years to come. The overwhelming feeling experienced in my senses was something that can never be replaced by objects or money. Knowing that God made this world and brought this person to me makes me understand how thankful and blessed I am. It was an unstoppable feeling that made me wish the moment would never end.

Thanks to the ability of writing, I am able to document the moment I will treasure forever and keep the memory alive. Just two humans and the colors of the sky. The most precious gifts of all. Happy New Year.

The Balance

It has been extra hard for me to find a balance between school, work, and a long-term relationship lately. I can’t do it on my own but with God’s help I have been able to manage. I may not be the best at one specific thing but I give it my all in everything. I am unwilling to sacrifice any of the most important things in my life, but I am learning how busy and tough life can get. It is in these times especially that I find myself turning to God for strength. I remind myself of Philippians 4:13 that “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.”

Having people around me that support me has been the biggest help, along with time management. I have found that allocating my time appropriately to my priorities gives me time to spend with the people I love and doing the things I love. I have barely found time to watch Netflix or have much actual alone relaxing time, but it’s worth it to spend time doing things that are more important and have lasting value. I always think that experiences are worth so much more than material things. I find my joy and fulfillment by making time for the people close to me. Whether that be an hour or two with my boyfriend or going the gym with my gal pals, I have been putting an emphasis on finding happiness in the little things of life.

Never underestimate the power of surrounding yourself with people that love and support you. It’s always better to have people to rejoice with and receive comfort from, regardless of the outcome. Find the balance. Make it work.

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The Search

Today I had my first real video interview. It was nerve wrecking to say the least. However, it was a great learning experience. Sometimes it’s important to take a leap of faith and try something new. I am learning to keep my options wide open and see what I can find. The job search can be a long and daunting task but with each new opportunity comes room for growth. Through the interviews I have encountered, I have learned more about myself and how to really showcase my strengths and core values that matter to me.

You never know when the next door might be opened in your life, so keep searching, keep looking, keep pushing, and one day you will find all that you’ve ever dreamed of. Not all good things happen immediately and some take years to progress, but happiness is subjective. Don’t limit yourself to what makes other happy. Determine what is important to you and go out there and make it happen. The first choice might not always be the best, but life is about learning and growing.

Find what makes you shine and do something about it. You might even surprise yourself.

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The Person

Everyone deserves to find the right person to love. The one who gets their sense of humor, appreciates them for who they are, and loves every bit. The one who knows their strengths and weaknesses and works hard to praise them for their strong suits and helps them improve on their weaknesses. The person with whom they can be wholly their dorky weird selves around.

Never settle for anyone less than the best. There are people out there for everyone. Yes, it’s true everybody is different, but when there is a special connection it will be evident. It’s good to have an open mind but also have definite traits that are important to the individual. Keep persevering, stay actively patient, and be alert to people around you.

You just might find the person that completes you.

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The Lesson

Tonight I learned a valuable lesson. Life is what you make of it. If you don’t like something about your life, change it! Only you have the power to make a change in your life. No one else can convince you.  I found that my life was becoming so overrun by school and work that I wasn’t able to fathom changing my schedule to make time for people.

I have some valuable friendships that I don’t want to lose and I have to consciously make an effort to nurture them. Lately I have been distancing myself, it seems, from the world. Tonight I really hit rock bottom and decided to take a stand. Yes, school and work are important and I still place them high on my list of priorities, BUT the whole purpose of life is having personal relationships and community. We are not meant to go through this life alone.

Just remember that it’s important to prioritize the most precious things in life – relationships. Never let them go.

 

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